I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
