Betty ford says i'm here all night
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
tell me about the fingering
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