Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
