JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Couch. On fire.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
