I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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