This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
