New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
