the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
