the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Randomize
