Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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