its not stalking. its research.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
