Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
