Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
