But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
