i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Randomize