C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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