I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
These tits shall not be calmed
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
