i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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