I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize