If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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