New low: just hacked my moms facebook
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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