oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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