Sry I called you an 8
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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