I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize