she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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