i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
