tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
you will always have a special place in my vag
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
