so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
