My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
