I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
