Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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