____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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