I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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