the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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