none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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