I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
