It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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