I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
