I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
you made out with another girl for some wings
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
