There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Just high enough for therapy.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
