Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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