i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
