did you get engaged???
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
