In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Cover your peen. We're going out.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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