I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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