Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
