please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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