Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize