I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
