I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
